This School Tarnishes The Name of Thomas Jefferson

This School Tarnishes The Name of Thomas

By: The Ghost of Thomas JeffersonOur Town succeeded singularly in the third act’s graveyard scene where the student’s natural, nebulous emoting only accidentally accomplished the proper atmospheric stage direction.

If only my grievance with the building title concluded with my disdain of the people the building serves, we might be able to salvage the situation by simply flogging the staff and sterilizing every single student. As it stands, my insistent protest far outreaches the unevolved mouth-breathers that inhabit the school.

This collection of building materials crudely thrown together not only insults my former person, but also anyone whom has ever drafted a building schematic. As I’m sure you do not know, I designed my own home of Monticello as an amalgam of French and Italian designs complete with my own innovative touches. This building you have so casually hung my name upon has all of the insightfulness and character of an abandoned stable.

The architecture pains my spectral vision in a way I believed only possible whilst living. Any fool with a protractor and slide rule could prove that the west mezzanine is, at peak capacity, but one more over-ripened sloth of a student away from total collapse into the ugliest atrium this ghost has ever seen, alive or dead. The structure has all the integrity of one Benedict Arnold.

I care not whether you find the above reasons worthy of removing my name from this institution. I require that the action be taken, if for the simple fact that this building stands for none of the values I coveted during my time on Earth.

Might I suggest a name more worthy of the direction and merit I have observed in the classrooms and hallways? A far more accurate moniker befitting your unsound halls of benightedness would be John Adams High School.

Regrettably,

The Posthumas Ghost of President Thomas Jefferson